"Wins as a fail"

I don’t know if I can do this…

I really don’t.

The class I, for whatever reason, thought might be minor is currently my hardest class, and then there’s Calculus II right behind it. Discrete Mathematics, the class I thought would be minor, currently makes little to no sense. Hopefully that changes, and quickly. At least Calculus II is making sense, so far. Data Structures & Algorithms isn’t necessarily difficult, yet, it’s just a lot of time-consuming work. Nothing I can do but keep hammering away at it all, and just hope I learn it. I already went and talked to my Discrete Mathematics professor and Calculus II professor about things I wasn’t grasping, and they helped some. Having a tentative work schedule of 9.5 hours a week isn’t helping. Which honestly isn’t even that much…. At least my boss is understanding and allows me to not come in if I let him know. But I think I really need to change my work schedule, if not quit. But I really don’t want to do that, for various reasons. Hopefully I either get into a rhythm and get used to the incessant exhaustion, or get a better grasp on things. I guess step  1 is going to be doing a lot more homework on weekends, so for now I just have to hold out until the weekend to get myself into a more gradual work load.

If everyone else can do this, why can’t I? I really hope I can….

1 B. Hopefully it’s doable. Still early in the semester, so who knows how things will change.

Nothing to do but keep trying, and think only about the homework I’m currently working on.

It’s not like I’m the first one who’s had to deal with this, and I’m sure people have dealt with harder. Heck, I’m sure my brother went through harder. And if he can do it so can I? Right?

At least I let people talk me out of 18 hours.